The Best Kind of "Happy"

With the wide circulation of Girls Gone Wild, Loving Annebelle, and the endless home video shots of countless college aged girls sucking and licking each other like how I used to eat an Oreo Cookie, the phrase, "No one knows a woman's body better than a woman" has never rang more true. Well, that's what all the new-age pseudo lesbians would have you think anyway.

I will confess that when measured against the true scale of supporting our gays (why do I feel the need to salute limp wristed and wink when I say that) I am an utter failure. I'm simply indifferent to their plight because I truly don't understand the urge to stick a dick in an area that doesn't self lubricate except for when the partner happens to have a case of food poisoning. I also think it's a bad idea to enter an area that does self lubricate but can be surrounded by hair that is not of the pubic family.

Lesbians are a different story though. Nobody really worries about them because they are not viewed as a threat which is mainly due to the understanding they are not "packing" and the threat of being ambushed by a rogue cock while in an enibriated state remains at zero percent. Pseudo lesbians are the best though because they are like the family dog that runs away for a day or two at a time. Each time they head out on a Beaver hunting excursion, they ultimately always come back home where they belong. Sure, the trip was fun while it lasted but they crave the attention and affection of the one that knows them best.